10 Year Old Boy is exceptionally mischievous, and loves to wind me up. He knows that a surefire way to do this is to answer every sentence of mine with "why?". He can go on like this for hours, bless him. I finally trumped him the other day though. I don't remember what the conversation was about, but it went on for some time, me saying something, him saying "why", me trying not to pop, until it culminated with this:
10YOB: "why?"
Me: "well then you were born"
10YOB: "why?"
Me: "because your father and I had sex"
10YOB: *blush* ... *squeak* ... *run away*
I've never seen him leave the kitchen so fast!
16 May 2009
Play teh cute!
I'm such a sucker for lolcats. And loldogs for that matter. I mean, cute animals, amusing captions, a way to spend hours avoiding the housework - what's not to love! And now they've gone and introduced another way for me to spend hours avoiding the stuff I'm actually supposed to be doing. In fact, two ways.
Now there are two Nom Nom Nom games. Simple, time-wasting, addictive - pull the cat's (or dog's tail), eat the noms and beat my score* - go on!
* It won't be that hard to beat my score. In fact it will be so easy to beat my score I haven't even bothered publishing it, because it was teh suck! But feel free to tell me yours, so I know just how much better you are than me!
Now there are two Nom Nom Nom games. Simple, time-wasting, addictive - pull the cat's (or dog's tail), eat the noms and beat my score* - go on!
* It won't be that hard to beat my score. In fact it will be so easy to beat my score I haven't even bothered publishing it, because it was teh suck! But feel free to tell me yours, so I know just how much better you are than me!
09 April 2009
What I've been doing
It's been a few weeks since my last proper post, so here's a quick recap of what's been happening. I have:
Ok, here's a clue. And it's just as awesome on my wrist as it looks in the picture.
- Been a bridesmaid in purple, and discovered that my Jurlique Citrus Silk Finishing Powder (bought cheap at Gold Coast Duty Free last year) is worth it's weight in gold for keeping my oily skin shine free during an outdoor wedding on a hot and very humid Auckland day.
- Survived 13 Year Old Girl's first day at high school, which was more exciting than it should have been when a passing crim attempted to snatch a parent's bag, and the welcoming powhiri was drowned out by the noise of the police helicopter circling overhead searching for the would-be purse snatcher.
- Had a delightful (and all too brief) visit from EEB's mum and step-father (the Eccentric English In-Laws).
- Laughed far harder than is possibly polite at the Eccentric English In-Laws' attempts to pronounce Maori words.
- Introduced the Eccentric English In-Laws to my wonderful Foster Parents on a trip to my home town of Dunedin, and realised that I am a short person surrounded by tall people.
- Had a delightful dinner with the Foster Parents and the Eccentric English In-Laws at Speights Ale House in Dunedin, where the lamb was lovely.
- And discovered Speights Pale Ale, a light, crisp brew which has replaced Corona as my beer of choice.
- Rediscovered the breathtaking majesty that is Central Otago.
- Dined for the second time at The Bunker in Queenstown, and had it reconfirmed as my favourite restaurant ever.
- Promised the Eccentric English In-Laws that next year we will visit them - hooray for a trip to England with a stop-over in Hong Kong. 10 Year Old Boy was a little underwhelmed by the possibility, until he realised that because we're going for three weeks he'll get an extra week off school after the school holidays. Now he's positively brimming with excitement!
- Had a prowler in our street who scared the living daylights out of our neighbours. When I went out to investigate the presence of police cars in the street the policewoman held up a pair of knickers and asked if they were mine - I had to to tell her that none of my knickers are that, well, delicate! Turns out they were stolen off the washing line of a lady a couple of houses round, the next time I saw her I complimented her on her taste in underwear. She only has one child, she may as well wear delicate frillies while she can!
Ok, here's a clue. And it's just as awesome on my wrist as it looks in the picture.
06 April 2009
Because one is never enough
The thing to do when you have a blog which you update sporadically is, obviously, to start a second blog. Which you will then update sporadically. So of course that's precisely what I've done ... Ladies and Gentlemen (well, just ladies actually because it's a blog about makeup and clothes and shoes), may I present to you my new blog, Pretty Clever.
21 January 2009
Bully to you
I was humming Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer to myself this morning (somewhat out of season I know but bear with me) when a thought occurred to me that I've had a few times before: the lyrics to that carol really annoy me. Think about it, Rudolph was picked on by the other reindeer because he was different, and it was only when he performed an heroic feat that he was elevated in their eyes and they stopped bullying him. Now don't get me wrong, this is not some diatribe about the writers and purveyors of this message, which also turns up in many teen angst-ridden dramas on screen and in print. They're only writing what's already there. How many of us, on the receiving end of bullying, have fantasised about being revealed as the lead singer of a famous rock band, or an ass-kicking laser gun-wielding secret agent for a secret government agency fighting alien invasions (ok so those two particular fantasies are mine) thereby earning the respect and adulation of their former bullies?
I was bullied throughout my school years, and the truth is if I had had the chutzpah to be a rock singer or secret government agent then I wouldn't have been bullied in the first place, because bullies have an innate ability to read people and they can spot the ones like me whose body language and glances say "I have no self esteem, please just ignore me".
There was one particular girl at high school who bullied me mercilessly, both with words and occasionally more physical methods, followed by a gaggle of her friends all eager to join in the fun. I was incredibly lucky that I had a wonderful best friend who stood up for me, and formed herself and the rest of our group into an honour guard of sorts around me whenever they saw her coming across the school field. A trip to the school counsellors office in tears eventually put a stop to her bullying (what methods he used to convince her to cease I don't know, I just know my relief was immeasurable). A couple of years later, after she had left school, I ran into her one day when I was out with my father - she was the checkout operator on our till at the supermarket. My heart sank when I saw her, but she astounded me by apologising, in front of my father, for the way she had treated me. I don't remember my answer (I do remember the interrogation from my father afterwards, I'd never told him about the situation), but to this day I have the utmost respect for that girl. It took some guts to say that, in the presence of my father and the other customers, and it just goes to show that just as victims don't always have to be victims, so too can bullies change their ways - and it doesn't take an heroic act to bring it about.
I was bullied throughout my school years, and the truth is if I had had the chutzpah to be a rock singer or secret government agent then I wouldn't have been bullied in the first place, because bullies have an innate ability to read people and they can spot the ones like me whose body language and glances say "I have no self esteem, please just ignore me".
There was one particular girl at high school who bullied me mercilessly, both with words and occasionally more physical methods, followed by a gaggle of her friends all eager to join in the fun. I was incredibly lucky that I had a wonderful best friend who stood up for me, and formed herself and the rest of our group into an honour guard of sorts around me whenever they saw her coming across the school field. A trip to the school counsellors office in tears eventually put a stop to her bullying (what methods he used to convince her to cease I don't know, I just know my relief was immeasurable). A couple of years later, after she had left school, I ran into her one day when I was out with my father - she was the checkout operator on our till at the supermarket. My heart sank when I saw her, but she astounded me by apologising, in front of my father, for the way she had treated me. I don't remember my answer (I do remember the interrogation from my father afterwards, I'd never told him about the situation), but to this day I have the utmost respect for that girl. It took some guts to say that, in the presence of my father and the other customers, and it just goes to show that just as victims don't always have to be victims, so too can bullies change their ways - and it doesn't take an heroic act to bring it about.
19 November 2008
Oh boy
Bizarre vignette of the day: Jessie lying on the beanbag happily chewing on a toy with Fred straddled across her back, his little legs barely touching the floor, merrily humping away.
Seriously, this is what passes for normal in our house!
Seriously, this is what passes for normal in our house!
13 November 2008
It's called an elevator
Watching The Big Bang Theory last night (my current favourite), the scene in which Sheldon and Penny are having a conversation as they walk the numerous flights of stairs to their apartments. On each landing they pass the elevator doors, criss-crossed with 'Out of Order' tape. In the ad break 9 Year Old Boy turns to me and asks "Mummy, why are so many of those rooms out of order?".
11 November 2008
My morning fix
I'm at the computer with my morning cup of coffee catching up on my blog reading (also know as avoiding the housework) so I thought I'd share a few of this morning's favourite links:
From Shoewawa, boot wearing season is over here in NZ with summer on its way, and I couldn't afford these in a month of Sundays, but I love love love these Thomas Wylde boots.
The heel, the multiple skull buckles, even the slouchiness (which wouldn't normally win me over) - available here.
From Fashionably Geek, no I haven't reversed the picture, this watch actually runs backwards. Leonardo da Vinci was left-handed (like me) and the theory is that his backwards writing was not an attempt to write in code, but rather to avoid smudging the ink as he wrote.
And it's beautiful to look at. Available at The Unemployed Philosophers Guild, the same site that carries the Dali watch I love so much.
The Boston Globe's Big Picture blog is a favourite of mine - the photo collections are always stunning, and today's Antarctica pics almost have me thinking it would be worth braving the cold to go there (I said almost, I seriously hate the cold).
And to end, something a little ghoulish. Ugly Overload has some mosquito photos that will have you reaching for the insect repellant.
And now I should start my day, but tearing myself away from the window may be a little difficult. The lady across the road has had a gardener in the last few days, and today he's out there shovelling topsoil. Young? Check. Tanned? Check. Topless? Check. Toned physique? Check. EEB looked somewhat suspicious when I tried to convince him that maybe he should go in to the office today rather than working from home. I wonder why...
From Shoewawa, boot wearing season is over here in NZ with summer on its way, and I couldn't afford these in a month of Sundays, but I love love love these Thomas Wylde boots.
The heel, the multiple skull buckles, even the slouchiness (which wouldn't normally win me over) - available here.
From Fashionably Geek, no I haven't reversed the picture, this watch actually runs backwards. Leonardo da Vinci was left-handed (like me) and the theory is that his backwards writing was not an attempt to write in code, but rather to avoid smudging the ink as he wrote.
And it's beautiful to look at. Available at The Unemployed Philosophers Guild, the same site that carries the Dali watch I love so much.
The Boston Globe's Big Picture blog is a favourite of mine - the photo collections are always stunning, and today's Antarctica pics almost have me thinking it would be worth braving the cold to go there (I said almost, I seriously hate the cold).
(Image: Zee Evans/National Science Foundation)
And to end, something a little ghoulish. Ugly Overload has some mosquito photos that will have you reaching for the insect repellant.
And now I should start my day, but tearing myself away from the window may be a little difficult. The lady across the road has had a gardener in the last few days, and today he's out there shovelling topsoil. Young? Check. Tanned? Check. Topless? Check. Toned physique? Check. EEB looked somewhat suspicious when I tried to convince him that maybe he should go in to the office today rather than working from home. I wonder why...
10 November 2008
This is what you get for having kids
After the post about the bean bag explosion EEB's mum emailed me with the story of the time she had taken EEB and his sister shopping and they managed to open the zip on a bean bag and spill the beans all over the store. EEBM quite rightly pretended they weren't with her (oh how many times have I done that).
It's no secret that children were put on this planet to embarrass their parents. When 9 Year Old Boy was a toddler he couldn't make his 't' sounds, and replaced them with 'f'. Imagine if you will how much fun it is when, in the middle of a busy doctor's surgery filled with old ladies, your son announces that he has just seen out the window "the biggest f**k ever"!
Then there was my friend whose daughter went to play at a friends house and decided to indulge her artistic side. Not long after she came home her mum was startled to receive a phone call from the friend's mum, who just wanted to let her know that a certain little girl had written on her son's penis. (Can't have been a very long sentence, one imagines). Luckily the friend's mum had a sense of humour.
When I was a teenager, living with my foster family, my one and a half year old foster sister decided her doll's hair needed washing and promptly did so ... in the toilet!
Thirteen Year Old Girl has always had a knack for asking awkward questions. On one occasion when she was teeny we arrived at my grandparents' house for a family gathering. Great-Grandpa was nowhere to be seen, and upon enquiring wee girl was told he was in the toilet. "Is he sitting down or standing up?" she asked the assembled family members.
Fast forward to another family gathering, wee girl's dad was somewhat uncomfortable at the time having been stricken with epidydimitis ('epidydimis' being the tubing in the testicles, 'itis' being an infection - you do the math) and wee girl was under strict instructions not to jump on him. Well she arrived at grandparents' house, bounced straight onto Great-Grandpa's lap for a cuddle, stopped for a moment then turned to GG and asked very seriously "Grandpa do YOU have infected testicles?".
All I can say is they better look after me in my dotage, because I've earned it!
It's no secret that children were put on this planet to embarrass their parents. When 9 Year Old Boy was a toddler he couldn't make his 't' sounds, and replaced them with 'f'. Imagine if you will how much fun it is when, in the middle of a busy doctor's surgery filled with old ladies, your son announces that he has just seen out the window "the biggest f**k ever"!
Then there was my friend whose daughter went to play at a friends house and decided to indulge her artistic side. Not long after she came home her mum was startled to receive a phone call from the friend's mum, who just wanted to let her know that a certain little girl had written on her son's penis. (Can't have been a very long sentence, one imagines). Luckily the friend's mum had a sense of humour.
When I was a teenager, living with my foster family, my one and a half year old foster sister decided her doll's hair needed washing and promptly did so ... in the toilet!
Thirteen Year Old Girl has always had a knack for asking awkward questions. On one occasion when she was teeny we arrived at my grandparents' house for a family gathering. Great-Grandpa was nowhere to be seen, and upon enquiring wee girl was told he was in the toilet. "Is he sitting down or standing up?" she asked the assembled family members.
Fast forward to another family gathering, wee girl's dad was somewhat uncomfortable at the time having been stricken with epidydimitis ('epidydimis' being the tubing in the testicles, 'itis' being an infection - you do the math) and wee girl was under strict instructions not to jump on him. Well she arrived at grandparents' house, bounced straight onto Great-Grandpa's lap for a cuddle, stopped for a moment then turned to GG and asked very seriously "Grandpa do YOU have infected testicles?".
All I can say is they better look after me in my dotage, because I've earned it!
05 November 2008
Does this mean I'm a grown up?
I'm glued to CNN watching the US elections. Also, GO OBAMA!
Still not entirely clear on how the American elections work, is it just me or is it all very complicated? If it weren't for hours and hours of West Wing viewing I wouldn't have even the faintest idea what was going on!
Still not entirely clear on how the American elections work, is it just me or is it all very complicated? If it weren't for hours and hours of West Wing viewing I wouldn't have even the faintest idea what was going on!
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